We put ourselves in the Circle. Enter from the Eastern Door. Circle the fire once, always clockwise. When leaving, always circle once, clockwise, then leave by the Western Door.
[The is the second post in two part arc that started with Class/Book Notes – Lucid Dreaming and Shamanic Work, Part 1, which explained Lucid Dreaming and dealt with issues of trust and control. Here we continue with journeying, more about trust and control, and other differences between shamanic work and lucid dreaming. This arc is part of a series excerpted from our class and book notes that started with Class/Book Notes – Teaching and Community.]We left off in Part 1 with control and trust.
Some people have the concern that they may go somewhere (during a journey) and it will be horrible. First and as offered in Part 1, you halt any shamanic activity by stating something like “I don’t want to do this”, “I don’t want to go there”, “I want to go back” and so on.
Second, recognize that it’s your perception which is horrible. None of the people I’ve studied with have ever had horrible events. They’ve all had learning events and learning events can be uncomfortable, disturbing, difficult, et cetera. They’re also always rewarding, enlightening, embracing and enlivening, et cetera.
One of the people who works with me says every time she journeys she’s met by either a mountain lion or a wolf. She feels they are coming to get her and she’s terrified so she runs away. When she runs far enough she comes back.
I asked “What is so terrifying?”
“I’m afraid of them.”
“What did they do to you that you are afraid of them?”
“They’re coming towards me.”
“Are they being aggressive?”
“No. They’re just walking towards me.”
“So the reason that it’s frightening is because you’re afraid of what they might do.”
“Yes, of course. Wouldn’t you be?”
Five times I got torn apart.
“Yes, when I first started doing this, I was.”
My First Journey
I was introduced to my first teacher during my first journey. This creature came up to me and I asked, “Are you my teacher?” In answer, it disemboweled me. I got ripped right open. It was amazingly painful. Standing there, watching my intestines plop out of me onto the ground, I had two choices; submit to my fear or learn.
Instead of running around, running back home, I asked a second time, “Are you my teacher?” and got torn open again. Now my internal organs are pouring out of me.
Most people think this is enough. Most people think, you ask once, you get mauled, you go home. I didn’t do that. I stayed and asked five times. Five times I got torn apart.
The Wounding
Being torn apart – wounded – five times should be familiar to anyone who’s studied The Practice. It corresponds to the sticky-hair, sticky-coat and similar myths from cultures worldround. In these myths, the five senses must be given away before the knowledge of the true realization can be given or found. The protagonist (me, in this case) is confronted by some antagonist who really is more teacher than antagonist. However, the protagonist must realize his usual abilities, usually representing the senses of sight, hearing, taste, smell and touch, are worthless. In other words, what is known must be given up, relinquished and cast aside, before anything can be learned. I’ve often thought is this shamanic form of “Every morning wake a blank slate that the day might write itself upon you.”
Courage is not a lack of fear. Courage is what you do when you’re afraid.
Now, the sixth time, I asked, “Are you my teacher?” The entity this time said, “Yes, we had to get all of everything which you knew out of you to make way for the new knowledge that we bring.” My willingness to endure that experience was an indication to my human teachers that I was ready to continue my studies and worth their time as a student. As one of them said to me, “Courage is not a lack of fear. Courage is what you do when you’re afraid.”
That was comforting and I really wanted to ask, “There couldn’t have been a different way, could it?” I’ve also learned (an amusing anecdote I share elsewhere) that not everyone gets wounded when they journey. Joe Della Rosa also wrote an excellent post about wounding.
Giving Up Control
So you have control in journeying to the extent you can say “No, I don’t want to do this.” “No, I don’t want to go there.” and the truth is, I encourage you to go through whatever situations, whatever events are taking place because shamanic practice — for me — has been about learning about myself, learning who I am, more and more and more. Learning not only about who this sack-of-flesh is, but learning the Who Which I am in this universe, learning how far I am in this universe, which means learning my responsibilities in this universe.
So, Lucid Dreaming is where you gain control. you decide to turn and face the monster, you decide to turn and face and talk to whoever, or you decide to leave the dream.
Also realize that often, when the other worlds can’t get your attention any other way, they will come to you in your dreams. For example, if you have a repetitive dream that you know has meaning, evokes some strong physiological reaction in you, yet which you are powerless to do anything about, you may want to consider that dream as possibly an invitation to journey. It could be that something’s been trying to get your attention for some time and the only way you’re able to receive the call is via dreams.
Joseph, great post. A large theme of The Practice to me seems to be about relinquishing control – or perhaps relinquishing the illusion of control, because in not trusting myself/ the experience / the information, I can’t be open to the new. Once I am open to the new, then I can learn and this is followed by taking responsibility for what I learn. Can you tell me a bit about desire to control versus taking responsibility? Is desire for control rooted in feeling secure only in the known and not trusting the new?
Thanks,
It’s interesting that it’s about “relinquishing control” because that’s not quite my experience. To me, self-awareness requires lots of self-control. It takes control to be open to new experiences.
If the statement is about control over others or external events…yeah, kind of. That’s one of the paradoxes of The Practice to me; the more I study, the more I’m able to control (or at least influence) what goes on around me. The paradox is that the more I’m able to do such things the less I want to do them. This is a reflection of something in the Principles; if I want the freedom to follow my own path then I have to be willing to let others follow their own path.
This, of course, does mean one takes responsibility for themselves, their behavior, their responses and so on. And again, this is a reflection of the Principles. We take responsibility for ourselves, not for others because if we do take responsibility for others we deny them the right of self-evolution, enlightenment, growth, what have you.
Now we can add in what happens when two (or more) people agree to study together. In such situations there’s an assumption of responsibility for each other but not complete responsibility. We can guide but not lead. We don’t push or pull people where they don’t want to go. We can show them what’s capable, instruct them on how to do something and if they don’t, won’t or can’t do it, we explore so we can study more effectively. Again, not control of each other but respect for ourselves and by respecting ourselves we respect each other (again, something in The Principles).
Hope that helps.