It has been 6 months since I officially started working with Joseph and Susan, 6 months since I devoted myself to the Practice and the principles of NextStage. I thought this would be the perfect time to give myself and the Practice a sort of mid-period assessment.
When I think of noticeable changes in myself since Practicing, immediately what comes to mind is my overall increase in self-awareness. The personalized exercises given to me by Joseph have acted like a mirror; I can view my “whole self” better than I ever could without the exercises. I can see where I want to make changes in my life, and find myself catching what I want to change before it happens way more than I ever did 6-7 months ago. Also, I am no longer surprised when I get over a spiritual hump and find my moment of reprieve is short lived. This path is a life long journey with struggles and rewards along the way, and lots of hard work. Also, I am recognizing levels of awareness both up and down (perceived; directionally). I’ve heard Joseph describe this as “Going Wide,” however I have only felt the sensation a few times, particularly when I am seeing and feeling as the child within me sees and feels.
It is helping me to differentiate between “believe,” “feel,” and “know.”
Also, I know the exercises have worked my mind in a similar way that lifting weights works my body. And I often feel as I am centering and lowering my energy, that I have entered an area in my memories where dreams are stored. It’s great for remembering dreams that seemed to disappear from memory in the morning as the pre-frontal cortex takes over. It is helping me to differentiate between “believe,” “feel,” and “know.”
I’ve learned to embrace fear. I’ve also learned that fear is much more covert in the ways it controls us than when we were children. For a child, fear almost always elicits a very recognizable response. As I have gotten older, fear is almost never obvious. It’s becoming more obvious to me the more I practice my exercises but the source of the fear is still a little elusive. If something is uncomfortable for me, I know there is a lesson waiting to be fleshed out. And there seems to be an endless amount of knowledge and wisdom behind every negative emotion (i.e. via negativa, emotional trauma, etc).
…fear is almost never obvious.
It is not an easy path; it requires work and a considerable amount of discomfort at times, as I have written about. But the rewards are well worth it. Do you road rage? Do you “sweat the small stuff?” Do you ever find yourself overreacting? Do you have PTSD for any reason including a traumatic childhood? The Practice has helped me to embrace my fears to take back control of my life, and it can do the same for you.
Great post. It’s always good when we recognize our own growth.
Thanks for allowing me to share in your journey.
And thank you for helping to facilitate. I’ve never experienced this much change for the positive in such a short period of time. We all know perceived negative changes can happen quickly, but positive changes are often so subtle as to be unnoticed for years, if ever.
That is a great post. You’ve done lots of work to recognize those things. Thanks for letting us share in your journey.
Thank you. I was telling Joseph last weekend that I didn’t realize how much The Practice has been incorporated into the many facets of my life. The knowing and understanding of that now feels like a “next step.”
Hi Joe, great post. Would you say that your awareness has caused a reduction in your fear? Or are you just recognizing and experiencing it differently?
Definitely a reduction… I become somewhat desensitized to fear through awareness. Plus, understanding the root of a specific fear or phobia goes a long way toward healing old wounds which has the added effect of lessening or eliminating fears. Thanks for the question and for reading.